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« July 5, 2018, Thursday - HATCH Dance opens at Southern Theater | Main | July 4, 2018, Wednesday - Red, White and Boom! »

July 4, 2018, Wednesday - Freedom From Pants Ride XII

Time: 6 PM - 11:30 PM (Meet at 6pm, rollout around 7pm)  

Location:  Meetup has been moved to underneath the Hennepin Bridge on Nicollet Island

Freedom From Pants Ride XII

The most fun you can have on a bike, lots of friends and lots of skin.

Ride leaves at 7pm sharp. A couple stops for drinks, beaches, underpants, good times

To make the ride fun for everyone, here are a few things to avoid:
1) NO UNSOLICITED TOUCHING!!!! If we see you grabbing other people or making unwanted advances at anyone you will be immediately ejected and nothing will be done to stop the ass kicking you might receive. This isn't an event for you to come and hit on other people or to get laid. THIS IS A SAFE SPACE EVENT! Keep your hands to yourself. 
2) Litter. This is totally shitty, and definitely a reason that this ride could run into problems in the future. Plus, there's really no excuse. If you can carry full beers on your bike, you can carry empties on your way out.
3) Telling people that they _need_ to take off their shirt, or that they're wearing too many clothes. Really? Just don't. Different folks have different comfort levels. I assure you, if someone is wearing a shirt or shorts in a crowd of people in their underwear, you don't need to point out that they're wearing more clothes than everyone else. They know.
4) Fireworks. I'm not a huge fan of fireworks being shot off at every stop. There's a whole lot of exposed skin in this crowd, and sparks hurt. Also, it just seems like shooting a bunch of flares up into the sky over a bunch drunk in public is like drawing a map for the cops that says PUBLIC INTOXICATION AND NAKED PEOPLE HERE
5) Hidden Beach. This ride has been to Hidden Beach before, and it didn't go well. It's the only time in 9 years that we had the cops come to move us along. Maybe it's unrelated, but I'd rather not test it.
6) Squirt guns. I heard of at least one case where somebody was spraying people in the face, and who kept spraying people who asked to not be sprayed. Seriously? I don't even know what to say about this. If you want to bring squirt guns, great, but if you're using them like a complete unmitigated asshole, please don't come on this ride. I'm guessing that you also litter, yell at bystanders to take their pants off, and shoot off fireworks while kicking puppies or something.